
An outstanding work strongly recommended by The Cellars.
Collared
The Story of a Sir and Her Priest
A deeply personal memoir documenting the evolution of a real Female Dominance and Master/slave relationship through journals, letters, scene reports, and reflections. More than a love story, Collared offers an intimate portrait of trust, ownership, service, identity, and Leather culture as lived experience.
- Author
- Melissa Cohen
- First published
- 2013
- Current edition
- First Edition (2013)
- Edition notes
- First published by Alfred Press in 2013. This record describes the first edition issued in cooperation with Lulu Enterprises.
- Publisher
- Alfred Press
- Language
- English
- ISBN-10
- 0982879472
- ISBN-13
- 9780982879474
- Type
- Memoir
- Tradition
- FemDom
- Period
- Contemporary Leather (2010s)
- Topics
- Female DominanceMaster/slave relationshipsLeather identityOwnershipServiceProtocolLeather FamilyMentorshipSpiritualityIdentityConsentPower ExchangePersonal journals
- Tags
- LeatherM/sFemale DominanceSirPriestServiceOwnershipProtocolJournalsLettersScene ReportsSpiritualityIdentityPersonal NarrativeBDSM
Suggested citation
Cohen, M. (2013). Collared: The Story of a Sir and Her Priest (First Edition (2013)). Alfred Press.
The Cellars Review
Abstract
Collared chronicles the development of an authentic Female Dominance relationship between the author and a Catholic priest exploring consensual submission. Rather than presenting fictionalised events or instructional material, the book preserves contemporaneous correspondence, personal journals, scene reports, and retrospective reflections that document the gradual construction of trust, authority, service, and ownership.
Through these primary sources, Melissa Cohen examines not only BDSM practice but also questions of identity, spirituality, vocation, gender, commitment, and emotional vulnerability. The result is both a relationship memoir and a valuable documentary record of contemporary Leather culture, illustrating how consensual power exchange develops over time through communication, negotiation, shared values, and mutual personal growth.
Historical Context
Published in 2013, Collared emerged during a period of increasing maturity within the contemporary BDSM and Leather communities, when autobiographical writing was becoming an important means of documenting lived experience alongside instructional literature. Unlike many earlier publications that focused primarily on techniques or protocols, this work preserves the day-to-day evolution of an authentic Master/slave relationship through journals, correspondence, and scene reports written during the relationship itself.
The book also reflects several significant developments of the early twenty-first century, including the growing visibility of Female Dominance, the expansion of online BDSM communities as spaces for meeting and education, and broader discussions surrounding gender identity, non-monogamy, spirituality, and authority. Its portrayal of a consensual power exchange involving an active Catholic priest adds an additional dimension, exploring the intersection between personal vocation, faith, identity, and Leather practice without reducing either to caricature.
Main Subjects
Female Dominance, Master/slave Relationships, Ownership, Service, Leather Identity, Protocol, Trust, Communication, Negotiation, Consent, Spirituality, Gender Identity, Personal Growth, Leather Family, Mentorship, Scene Reports, Relationship Development, Emotional Intimacy, Power Exchange, Authentic Leather Experience
Strengths
One of the greatest strengths of Collared is its authenticity. Rather than reconstructing events years later from memory, Melissa Cohen preserves much of the relationship through contemporaneous journals, emails, scene reports, and personal reflections, allowing readers to witness the gradual development of trust, authority, and emotional intimacy as they unfolded.
The work also excels in portraying power exchange as a lived relationship rather than a collection of scenes or techniques. Daily communication, negotiation, vulnerability, service, protocol, affection, conflict, and personal growth receive as much attention as BDSM activities themselves, offering a balanced representation rarely found in educational literature.
Another notable strength is the emotional honesty of both participants. Their uncertainties, mistakes, excitement, fears, and evolving understanding of ownership are documented without attempting to present either person as idealised or infallible. This transparency greatly enhances the documentary value of the book.
Finally, the narrative provides valuable insight into contemporary Leather culture, Female Dominance, mentorship, and consensual Master/slave dynamics while maintaining a respectful and deeply human perspective throughout.
Limitations
As a personal memoir, Collared reflects the experiences, beliefs, and relationship model of its author rather than attempting to provide a comprehensive representation of BDSM or Leather culture. Readers should therefore understand it as a primary personal document rather than a universal reference.
The narrative is intentionally subjective and emotionally intimate, sometimes prioritising personal reflection over broader historical or educational context. Those seeking structured instruction on BDSM techniques, protocols, negotiation, or safety will find relatively little explicit guidance compared with dedicated educational texts.
Certain aspects of the relationship—including its unique spiritual circumstances, the vocation of one participant, and their highly individual dynamic—are exceptional rather than representative of most consensual power exchange relationships. For that reason, the work is best appreciated as the documentation of one authentic Leather journey rather than as a model intended for replication.
Recommended Audience
Collared is recommended for readers interested in the lived experience of consensual power exchange rather than its technical instruction. It is particularly valuable for practitioners of Leather, Female Dominance, Master/slave relationships, and long-term D/s dynamics who wish to explore how authority, service, trust, and emotional intimacy develop over time.
The book will also appeal to historians of BDSM culture, students of relationship dynamics, and readers interested in identity, spirituality, gender, and the intersection between personal vocation and consensual authority exchange. Because it is fundamentally a memoir, it is best approached alongside educational texts rather than as a practical manual for learning BDSM.
Legacy
Although not as widely known as many foundational BDSM manuals, Collared has become one of the most respected autobiographical accounts of contemporary Female Dominance and Leather relationships. Its documentary character distinguishes it from both fictional narratives and instructional literature, preserving an unusually detailed record of how a consensual Master/slave relationship evolved through communication, reflection, and shared experience.
Within the literature of Female Dominance, the work is frequently recognised for its emotional honesty and for presenting ownership as an ongoing relationship built upon responsibility, trust, and mutual growth rather than fantasy alone. Its preservation of primary documents—including journals, correspondence, and scene reports—gives the book lasting historical value as a record of early twenty-first-century Leather culture.
Archivist Commentary
Within The Cellars, Collared should be regarded primarily as a historical document rather than as an instructional text. Its greatest contribution lies in preserving the internal life of a real Leather relationship with an exceptional level of transparency. Few works allow readers to observe the gradual emergence of ownership, protocol, communication, vulnerability, and service through the words written by the participants as events unfolded.
For archivists and students of Leather history, this contemporaneous documentation provides significant cultural value. It captures not only BDSM practices but also the emotional, philosophical, and interpersonal processes that sustain a long-term authority exchange. The inclusion of letters, journals, and scene reports transforms the work into a primary source that preserves lived experience rather than retrospective interpretation.
Its unique circumstances—including the involvement of an active Catholic priest, discussions of spirituality, gender identity, and non-monogamy—should not be interpreted as defining characteristics of Leather culture. Instead, they illustrate one authentic relationship situated within its own historical and personal context. Read in this way, Collared stands as one of the most important autobiographical testimonies currently preserved within The Cellars for understanding contemporary Female Dominance and Master/slave relationships.
Within The Cellars
Discussion
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